Phone calls with a teenager

Phone call No 1:

"Shelly, right, that's it I am leaving here, I've had enough of this shit. That wagon, is out of line and I am going to report her and she is dead as soon as I am finished with her. You know what she did, she feckin said I couldn't bring my portfolio home with me? Like what the feck, who does she think she is. I'm NOT staying here with this shit, I don't need this crap"
"I.."
"And I'm feeling sick and she's making me feel shit and who the hell does she think she is to tell me"
"Well"
"She's nothing, she's a and a and this is shit. Reporting her isn't going to work, nothing is going to change, its crap, and I'm not putting up with it. I am standing up for what I believe and this is just crap"
"But,"
"I'm leaving and I'm taking my portfolio"
"You're staying in school"
"YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND, its all about rules this and rules that and I am not being oppressed. "
"We have all to sometimes put up with situations we don't like, sometimes I don't want to come to work, but if I gave up and just walked out, where would we be?"
"Oh, its always about a good job and money with you, what about my beliefs , what about me standing up for myself, just because you allow yourself to be walked all over does not mean its going to happen to me"
"Stay put"
"But Shelly , you don't understand, its shit and she has no right and stop making excuses for her"
"Okay, we'll talk about it this evening, okay?"
"Kay"

* Hangs up *

Phone call no 2:
In a hushed tone
"Shelly, I'm in trouble"
"What?! What's up?"
"You know the way my ginge got the shit kicked out her, well, the dolphin is coming down to the school to beat us all up"
"He's what? Calm down, I can't understand a word you're saying"
"He's getting a gang together to beat us all up!!"
"Okay, now seriously, do you think?"
"Isn't school nearly over and where is the ginge?"
"She's in the loo crying"
"Well, when school is over, just come home.."
"I can't leave the others all by themselves!!! SHELLY, I am warning you, if I knife someone.."
"Where will you get the knife?"
"I forgot it today..." silence "Only kidding, just warning you if I arrive home beat up, there'll be trouble"
"Yes, there will. If anyone lays a hand on you, there will be trouble and I'd like to think Mister Flipper knows this. I sincerely doubt he will arrive down at the school to beat up a group of school girls"
"Okay."
"Chat to you this evening"
"Kay, bye bye"

The people I work with must think I have some sort of drug problem from the amount of mumbled conversations I am having in the hallway.