The morning shift

Most mornings I will be the one making the lunch and yelling at her to get breakfast but sometimes Mammy2 has been known to get up with her. Its usually if I am sick or on a day off. The reason being, I start work around 8.30 and Mammy2 strolls into work for 10 if she's up on time.
This morning, whilst making her lunch, jam and cheese sandwiches, not together folks, how odd do you think our family are, she yells out asking me to make her breakfast. I respond to the yell some lovely phrase along the lines of Bite Me. I continue to put blackcurrant jam on the bread whilst pulling the blackcurrants out. Yes, she likes blackcurrant jam with no blackcurrants. You should see me try and make cheese sandwiches without the cheese. I finish the lunch making process and then start on the cling form procedure. I say procedure because it is just that. Its like a military operation. It is akin to the other 2 dangerous household procedures.

- Opening the clothes horse
- Unfolding the ironing board

I have often nearly lost limbs doing either of the above. Its also more difficult when you are trying to ensure you wake no-one in the place because you are up at an ungodly hour doing laundry. Usually in that instance I end up in the middle of the clothes horse or under the ironing board where my pleas for help are ignored by the goldfish. They're usually disgruntled because I have forgotten to feed them.

Clingfilm, it looks so easy when someone else does it. The serated edge acts exactly like its supposed to. By the time I am finished wrapping her lunch up in clingform, her lunch consists of

- jam sandwiches
- one toaster
- 14 fridgemagnets
- 3 knives
- one pot of jam
- a bin
- one washing machine.

And I am covered in cuts from the serated edge.

And so on and so forth. You know its amazing. I can write code for most of things but wrapping up sandwiches brings me out in cold sweat. She arrives out from the bedroom looking immaculate as always and repeats her request for me to get her breakfast. I fight my way out of the kitchen from the clingy film and tell her I make lunch and thats its. No breakfast. She utters the words
"Mammy2 always makes me breakfast"
"Well , I'm not Mammy bloody 2 am I" I'm not the most articulate first thing in the morning.
She mumbles to herself and manages to make herself breakfast. Mammy2 also waits at the bus stop with her and waves her off. I walk her as far as I am going and then wave her off. I think she
prefers Mammy2 to do the morning shift. She'll be waiting.

The summer exams are just around the corner. This morning she told me that in 3 weeks she'll be in sixth year. The teachers are already preparing them for the leaving cert. Next year is going to be great fun. She won a competition for something or other. She had to design a poster for disablity access and her poster was selected out of everyone elses. She won a playstation2 which she is going to flog I think. We bought her a playstation2 a few months ago. Damn it, if only we'd waited.